AM I BECOMING A GRUMP?

One of my favorite things to do is to go to funerals of saints.

Don’t get me wrong. Death is an Enemy. Death is not part of God’s original design for creation. The separation death brings (albeit temporary for believers) is painful. C.S. Lewis said it well, “The greater the love, the greater the loss.” So, we rightly weep when we lose a loved one.

That said, some of my greatest inspiration has come at the homegoing services of special Christ-followers. Having attended two such funerals recently, I left reflecting on my life—both convicted and motivated to live and die more like my brother (in his sixties) and sister (in her eighties). They left this world cheerfully—not kicking and screaming, pouting and whining—but with joy.

I’m understanding better what the psalmist wrote, “Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints” (116:15). I think these kinds of saints put an extra big smile on God’s face.

Some people age well. They get sweeter. Less irritable, less sulky, . . . happier and more pleasant. Many others do not. They get more grouchy and cranky. With filters weakened, they become more cross and complaining and difficult to live with.

I get it. Aging is hard business. Less energy. More pain. Less mobility. Diminished sensory capacities. Increasing loss of control. More dependence. Cognitive decline. Social isolation. Plenty of reasons to become sour.

When it comes to ending strong, John the Baptist proves a worthy model. He uttered one of the most amazing statements a human being can make as he was rounding the corner. A little context first, however.

John’s ministry is winding down. What he came to do is coming to a completion. The throngs he pointed to Jesus are doing just that, following him. The disciples of John are disturbed and feel threatened. He assures them that all is well, and everything is going according to plan. “The bride belongs to the bridegroom. The friend who attends the bridegroom waits and listens for him, and is full of joy when he hears the bridegroom’s voice. That joy is mine, and it is now complete (lit., filled to the top, crammed or packed in).”

To put John’s statement in colloquial terms, he blurts, “I am completely happy!” (or as an older board member of mine used to say, “If I were any happier, I’d be twins!”)

Think about that. John’s mission is over. He is walking off the stage (and definitely not into the sunset). The spotlight that was upon him is now shining on someone else. All the attention and clamor he once received has shifted to someone else. Anonymity awaits him (along with, unbeknown to him, impending death). And what is his response to all this? “I am overjoyed at just the sound of the bridegroom’s voice.”

John became more joyful the older he got, and it was not because his life got easier. (Remember? He got thrown into the slammer and was eventually beheaded because he called Herod the Great on the carpet for his adulterous relationship.) John’s happiness was not circumstantial but grounded deeply in his beholding of (looking at, apprehending) the Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world (see John 1:29, 36).

Another man who aged well was the Apostle Paul. Here he is on death row for his witness to Christ and yet finds himself in a peculiar dilemma. He confesses to the Philippians, “Getting released would afford me the opportunity to continue in my work, helping you progress in the joy found in your faith. That would be good. On the other hand, departing would usher me straight into the very presence of Jesus. Oh, what do I choose?” (my paraphrase, 1:21-25)

It is this same Paul writing from a prison cell who tells these Philippians a few chapters later not once but three times, “Rejoice in the Lord” (3:1; 4:4). We have a duty to delight in the Lord. To not be joyful is both selfish and sinful. It is selfish because gloominess adversely affects those around us. It is draining and sucks the life out of those in our proximity. And it is sinful (aka, grumpiness) because it is outright disobedience to God.

This does not mean we dance around coffins or clap our hands when the house burns down. We can (and should) still cry and lament. But we must find a way to praise God in the very midst of tragedy. Paul did. In 2 Corinthians, after outlining in great detail the suffering he was experiencing, wrote, “sorrowful, yet always rejoicing” (6:10). Joy is your job and nobody else’s. If you do not have joy, it is your own fault. And joy is a choice—not some “luck of the draw.” Joylessness (including grumpiness) is learned behavior which must be unlearned.

Joy matters. It is crucial to freedom. When you are unhappy, you are a sitting duck for any sin. My wife knows better than to send me to the grocery store on an empty stomach. I am a sucker for anything on the shelf when my belly is bereft of food. No wonder Nehemiah said that the joy of the Lord is our strength (8:10). Joy gives us resistance power against all that is contrary to God’s kingdom. Joy also furnishes us with persevering power. What was it that sustained Jesus in his darkest moment? The writer of Hebrews tells us: ” . . . for the joy set before him (he) endured the cross, scorning its shame” (12:2). That is why I like to say that Life Challenge is a “Joy Gymnasium.” We offer workouts and regimens to recovering addicts that bolster joy-strength.

I know, certain seasons of life make joy much harder. There are prolonged periods in everyone’s life where sorrow looms large and long. God knows. He sympathizes. But we cannot just lie down without a fight. We cannot excuse our melancholy week after week, month after month. There comes a time when we must acknowledge that joy, in the words of C.S. Lewis, is not only the “serious business of heaven;” it is the serious business of earth. The prophet Habakkuk concludes his short book with these challenging words, “Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior” (3:17-18).

I want to age better. I want to make God look good the older I get. And joy is how that will happen. I don’t want to become a grumpy old man. I want the overriding tone of my life to be happiness. I read once where an author pondered the possibility that maybe, just maybe, the question God will ask us on Judgment Day will be, “Did you enjoy yourself?” I pray I am able to say, “You better believe it Father! THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!!”

“Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.
Cast me not away from thy presence; take not thy Holy Spirit from me.
Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation.”
(Psalm 51:10-12)