I am what I am because of the people who have been in my life. This is particularly true for me of the women who have graced my life—from my mom to my great aunts, “Danny” and “Mike,” to some dear older saints who prayed for and stood with me early in my ministry, Mrs. Grose, Mrs. Johnston, and Sister Renee. Beginning with Lori, I cannot imagine how empty and incomplete my life would be without my beloved wife of thirty-five years. I could speak in great detail of how each of these women and others have made me better.
But that is for another time. Right now, I want to highlight one person in particular. Around Life Challenge, this woman is known as Sister-Pastor-Dr. Sheila Burrell.
Sheila has served faithfully by my side at Life Challenge for the last twenty-seven years (six as a volunteer and twenty-one as a staff member) in various capacities—Women’s Director, Men’s Director, Assistant to the Executive Director, Human Resources and Event Coordinator, and most recently, as Clinical Director. She has been the quintessential utility player—one who joyfully fills in the gaps wherever the need arises. Sheila is fiercely loyal, committed, thoughtful, generous, self-sacrificing, hard-working, and unusually strong. “Tough” in a word. The personal and ministry challenges she has endured would have taken most down. Not Sheila. Mack Trucks are like Matchboxes to her.
Sheila is a woman of deep faith in Christ. This has manifested itself in a life of integrity, trustworthiness, humility, purity, . . . holiness. Though she has experienced more than her share of disappointments from others, I have never known her to harbor a grudge, say an unkind word, or strike back at anyone who had wronged her. She is a woman of exceptional discernment. She has street smarts, academic pedigree, and something very special with the Holy Spirit. What was said of the prophets of old can be said of her, “Touch not the Lord’s anointed.”
I remember vividly a time when the two of us were trying to get to the bottom of something very serious relative to one of our residents. She and Al were in my office on one side of the table and me on the other. I watched her go back and forth with Al. It was textbook. No raising of the voice. No sign of negative emotion. Sheila simply proceeded with one question after another while I watched sweat beading up on Al’s forehead. Before I knew it, I started to feel guilty! Maybe I did it!? The truth soon came out. The needed business got done. (BTW: I did not do it.)
In crises, there is no one better to put in command. Over the years, I have affectionately referred to her as “The Weapon.” Every person needs at least one of these individuals in his or her life. Sheila has been mine. If there has been a problem, an issue, a conflict, . . . some kind of trouble, Sheila has been my go-to call. “Hey, I need you to address this situation.” “We have an individual out of control right now, would you take care of it?” “The house is on fire! HELP!” Never once did Sheila flinch. She jumped into the war zone and somehow, magically (I think she has some kind of secret wand), brought about a cease-fire.
Sheila is a calming presence. Working with men and women in addiction-recovery can be a crazy, never-ending roller-coaster ride. Temper tantrums, reactiveness, extreme mood swings, threatening behaviors, “sucker punches” out of the blue, you name it, . . . Sheila does not get riled (if she does, she keeps a great poker face). She goes about her duties with both professionalism and heart. She grieves and laments. She feels the pain of those caught in the clutches of substance abuse like few. She herself was bound by drug addiction for much of her life. But she does not allow the felt emotions to control her or cause her to lose balance. She is grounded in the deep and abiding belief that God is truly in control. This conviction coupled with her capacity for self-differentiation is a rare gift in my world.
I have learned so much from Sheila—both from her example and her “truisms.” I have said more than once to myself how I wished I had recorded what she had just said. One of those saying that rings in my head often as I try to come to terms with some of the upsetting behaviors of certain residents is, “Don’t ask: ‘How could so-and-so do such a thing?’ Rather, ‘What happened? What were the factors that caused this person to act as he or she did?’” Sheila would contend that nobody consciously and intentionally sets out to ruin his or her life. So, rather than judging someone, we must be more curious and compassionate. “Where are these maladaptive ways coming from? What wound is driving this set of actions?”
I will greatly miss Sheila. We will all greatly miss her. Sheila is retiring after a long, exemplary vocational career.
The strength of any organization—be it a business, team, church, ministry, etc.—ultimately depends on the people who staff it. Whatever success Life Challenge has achieved, it is owing to God’s grace mediated through people. Sheila is a telling witness that vision, mission, company values, strategy, policies, procedures, and programming combined take a distant second next to importance of the players who show up on the field day in and day out. Life Challenge is much better because of her.
Sheila, THANKS ! Well done, friend and colleague. You touched countless lives. You made so many people better. From your LC family, we wish you God-speed in this next chapter of your life.
Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Honor her for all that her hands have done,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.”
(Proverbs 31:29-31)
